Moebius Stripper

"[I]t’s still too early to tell."

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 10:43:11 GMT

This just in: long-range weather forecasting is still subject to tremendous uncertainty, even though it's almost Christmas!

God, I hate this time of year.

PSA

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 13:37:21 GMT

No one celebrates Chanukah "instead of" Christmas. Asking me if I do is much the same as asking if I had a sandwich instead of spaghetti for lunch.

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 22:51:49 GMT

Given my handle, I feel morally obligated to pass on George Hart's instructions for slicing a bagel. (via meep)

AND ANOTHER THING

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 04:50:52 GMT

For reasons that should be bloody obvious, I never want to see variants of the phrase "to become a statistic" ever again.

This can't end well

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 21:17:13 GMT

I went grocery shopping on the way home from work last night, and forgot to unpack my bag before leaving for work this morning. Consequently, during a two hour break from class during which I must complete a set of lecture notes and have no time for lunch, I am finding myself alone in my office with nothing edible aside from a box of soup stock...
...and a bag of chocolate chips.

I can't believe I read the whole thing

Mon, 02 Nov 2009 19:06:54 GMT

I suppose that when the subheading of an article is The Parthenon, Mona Lisa, Billie Jean … they share a secret formula. And the influence of the Fibonacci sequence doesn't stop there, I have only myself to blame for not summarily clicking on the little x at the top right-hand corner of the screen. Still, though: this stuff should not be published. Anywhere, ever.

(Less ranty version here.)

for future reference:

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 01:43:10 GMT

I own a food processor. There is NO REASON for me to be "finely chopping" 1.5 lbs of onions by hand.

Dear Googletalk and MSWord:

Mon, 19 Oct 2009 17:41:57 GMT

Sometimes, I wish to write equations and such. This often requires me to use certain symbols, such as "=" and "(", in sequence. I deeply resent it when you assume that I wish for you to turn these combinations of symbols into frowny (or smiley) faces.

In fact, even when I DO wish to use emoticons, I trust that my interlocutors can perform the 90 degree rotations on their own, so I do not require your assistance even then.

Mon, 19 Oct 2009 17:11:05 GMT

Randal Munroe's stick figure (the guy, not the girl) is totally living my fantasy.

Thu, 08 Oct 2009 03:18:54 GMT

Two confirmed cases of H1N1 in my calculus class. More, I'm sure, to follow.

I can't help but feel partly entirely responsible

Tue, 29 Sep 2009 19:47:16 GMT

My officemate caught swine flu last week. Half of my calculus students are coughing.

Tue, 25 Aug 2009 14:10:00 GMT

Yesterday, meep's 6-year-old asked me if I knew what all the dinosaur names meant. "No," I replied. "Kids tend to know a lot more than grownups do about dinosaurs."

In this case, certainly true (Meep's comments are in brackets):

mo: dimetredon means two sets of teeth
mo: stegosaurus means spiked tail, i think
[i don't think that's right because saurus means lizard]
mo: then spiked tail lizard
3:56 PM mo: and tyrannosaurus rex means tyrant lizard king
mo: triceratops means three horned face
mo: pteradon means toothless wing
mo: iguanadon means spiked thumb
3:57 PM [i don't think that's right]

A few months ago, I asked M what her favourite dinosaur was. "Triceratops is my favourite plant-eater," she said, "and Tyranosaurus Rex is my favourite meat-eater."

Home, finally

Sun, 16 Aug 2009 16:50:07 GMT

Dear [MP]

Thank you for your response from last month.

Ms. Mohamud is now back in Canada, and, predictably, Harper - whose minister of Foreign Affairs outright rejected Mohamud's claim of citizenship, and outrageously claimed that Mohamud was offering "no tangible proof" of citizenship, even as she offered all the proof she could, proof that is considered more than adequate in the voting booth - is taking full credit for getting her home at all. If indeed his government bears no responsibility for the inexcusible delay, then he should welcome the opportunity to prove as much in an official inquiry - which of course he is fighting. I urge you to push for an official inquiry, and to work toward implementing appropriate policy changes to ensure that such a situation does not arise again.

On a personal note, a few months ago, I applied for a new passport, and requested that my place of birth be omitted from the document. This is an option - Passport Canada even provides a form for the purpose - but not a well-publicized one. This option got some press a few years ago when it was highlighted by former Privacy Commissioner George Radwanski who, in the wake of Maher Arar's imprisonment in Syria, argued that listing one's birthplace on a passport constituted an unnecessary disclosure of information to foreign governments. Radwanski also recommended to Passport Canada that passports not list places of birth at all. With so many foreign-both Canadians abandoned by our government when they travel abroad, now may be a good time to remind both the government and the passport office of Section 15 of the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms.

Sincerely,
[me]

Renaud Garcia-Fons

Fri, 07 Aug 2009 16:34:46 GMT

Before I saw yesterday's show, I couldn't fathom how or why a double-bassist would be the front man for a trio.

Now I get it.

How to keep cool in hot weather:

Wed, 29 Jul 2009 16:27:15 GMT

MENTHOL GEL.

Seriously! This stuff is magical! I am coated in methol gel right now, and it is awesome! It is, in fact, so awesome that the fast-acting awesomeness of the stuff, combined with the radioactive blue colour, makes it a pretty safe bet that I've just sealed my fate, cancer-wise, but the bloody 40 DEGREE WEATHER does affect the cost-benefit analysis of such things.

I would bear Google's children if such a thing were biologically possible

Fri, 24 Jul 2009 23:38:56 GMT

http://www.google.ca/search?q=recursion

(via gdh)

Further to my last post:

Thu, 09 Jul 2009 19:02:20 GMT

I just sent this letter to my MP. Unfortunately, my MP is a member of the NDP, and while I'm sure she is on my side, her influence is limited. Canadian readers, feel free to plagiarize or adapt:

Dear [MP],

It was with great dismay that I read this morning of yet another foreign-born Canadian denied the right to return to her country of citizenship:

http://www.thestar.com/news/gta/article/662585

The Canadian government's official line is that the woman in question in is travelling under a false identity. Her passport photo, apparently, does not look sufficiently like her. The government has thus rejected her passport, driver's licence, and health card, as well as several of her family members' offers to vouch for her under oath. Such means of identification taken individually, incidentally, are considered sufficient proof of identity in the voting booth (http://www.elections.ca/content.asp?section=ele&dir=ids&document=index&lang=e&textonly=false); why does a different standard apply here? And even if it does, how does the Canadian government justify denying Ms. Mohamud the opportunity to provide her fingerprints, which would allow her to prove her identity beyond doubt?

This is at least the second time in the recent past that the Canadian government has played fast and loose with the law in order to deny entry to a foreign-born citizen. I urge you to use your influence to ensure that Canada upholds the rights of all of its citizens travelling abroad.

Sincerely,
[me]

Another foreign-born citizen stranded overseas

Thu, 09 Jul 2009 16:34:52 GMT

It would be too kind to say that the Canadian government is merely being complicit in the detention of this woman, whom they claim is travelling under a false identity. I'd say it's colluding to keep her stranded:

"When I applied for Canadian citizenship, they took my fingerprints," the Somali-born woman said yesterday by phone from Nairobi, where she is out on bail pending trial.

"They can match them."

The Canadian government is refusing to take her fingerprints.

Not that it should even have come to that. The Kenyan government, suddenly a reliable witness for the Canadian government, claims that Suaad Hagi Mohamud does not look like her passport photo. Cripes, who does? But in addition to a passport photo, Mohamud has a health card, driver's licence, and several dozen people who are willing to swear under oath that she is who she says she is.

Elections Canada considers any of these things, taken individually to be sufficient proof of identity in the voting booth. Ask your MP why the Canadian government won't uphold the law in this woman's case.

Jazz festival student showcase

Wed, 01 Jul 2009 04:05:26 GMT

When required to choose, musicwise, between "groundbreaking" and "listenable", I will choose the latter every time. If that makes me a philistine, then so be it.

Breaking news: 365 = 1 mod 7

Tue, 30 Jun 2009 23:15:02 GMT

This just might be the most inane "person on the street" report I've ever seen, and that's saying something.

I can haz electoral reform?

Sat, 06 Jun 2009 01:46:13 GMT

Wishlist: a voting system that reflects people's preferences well enough that when we have a substantial majority of voters wanting a different government, we also end up with a substantial majority of said voters wanting an election. When a scant third of decided voters prefer the ruling party over the alternatives - less than the proportion who favour the opposition party - but a measly quarter of decided voters think that voting for a new government is a good way to remedy this issue, something is awry.

secret ballot, or, how I almost got myself arrested when trying to vote

Tue, 12 May 2009 21:09:51 GMT

My apartment building is across the street from a seniors' residence, so I wasn't surprised to see that the fellow in front of me in the voting booth for Polling Station 70 was eighty-seven years old and visually impaired. A polling officer was helping him vote.

"What's this?" he said, too loudly. "Why do I get two ballots?"

"There's one for the provincial election, and one for the referendum."

"What? What do we have a referendum for?"

"Electoral reform."

"What's this?" said the voter, jabbing the ballot with a gnarled finger, and growing somewhat agitated. "What are these choices?"

"The choice is between first past the post - that's what we have now - and the single transferable vote."

"The what vote? What's that?"

"It's the new system."

"What's wrong with the old system?"

"Well, if you think nothing, you can vote to keep it."

"Well, I'm eighty-seven years old and have been voting for sixty-eight years, and everything seemed to be ok up till now. What's this new system?"

"It's called single transferable vote. Instead of voting for one person, you can choose more."

"What? Why would I do that? I don't even like any of them." He paused. "So if I choose a bunch, who do they pick, tell me that."

"Well, there's a system to count the votes, it's hard to explain."

Oh, I thought, fuck this. "Excuse me, sir," I said, "I can explain it to you if you want. It's not that complicated."

The polling officer looked up at me sternly. "You know it's illegal to campaign within 100 meters of a polling station."

"I'm not campaigning," I said, "I'm answering a question about the ballot that this gentleman is about to fill out."

"Let the young lady answer," said the old man, "This I want to hear."

"Please stand behind the line and wait your turn," repeated the officer.

Bloody hell.

"Well," declared the voter, "I see nothing wrong with how I've been voting all this time. How do I say that?"

"You put an X here."

"All right then." He marked the X. "And this other ballot?"

"That's for the main election. Here are the parties....here are the candidates."

"I see." He paused. "Well," he declared, "I sure don't like the Liberals."

External Hard Drives: So Help Me, I'm Just Not That Bright

Tue, 12 May 2009 18:57:53 GMT

So! This external hard drive I bought was designed to be idiot proof - connect two cables to the only places you can connect them to, double-click on the My Computer icon, and lo! the hard drive should be ready to use.

Except that it's not. And the troubleshooting section of the manual is nigh useless (Did you plug in your hard drive? Is the power on?). The Device manager tells me that I have an external hard drive, but I can't access it in any useful way. Halp plz?

Sun, 10 May 2009 06:59:49 GMT

Globe and Mail > > National Post

Sat, 04 Apr 2009 00:39:10 GMT

Have you stopped beating your wife?